Darren

Well, the Greens just got my vote.

These days, if you say you are English, you can be thrown in jail.

:edit: For the benefit of the downvoters.

topgrade -y

And my work here is done.

My lad’s bike was nicked from a train station a few months back. He’d left it there, locked in the rack while he was at work. You know, pretty standard stuff.

BTP told him they weren’t going to investigate it because it was left for longer than 2 hours.

I’m still fucking angry about that.

edit: Oh, just read the article, and yeah, that’s exactly what it’s about. Cunts.

I’d quite like to scrap Kemi Badenoch.

I’ve lost count of the fines I’ve received for having my dick out for Harambe, but I refuse to not show respect.

btw

We wanna be Kate!

“And now the news from Beans and AFC Wimbledon”

Any of the recent Pixels, though I’m not sure about the 10. And that’s it.

I’m running Graphene on a 9 and it’s solid.

I saw the London Symphony Orchestra play Holst’s The Planets at the Royal Albert Hall at the weekend. We were sat right up by the organ pipes, so when they started rumbling it was absolutely incredible.

10/10

I played their version of The Trooper on my radio show last week. Seemed go down very well indeed.

D, because I’m British and can’t trust them forrins to not put too much spice like salt in my food.

chinese burger meal

It is, as it happens.

I’ve gone one step further: my wife’s boyfriend fucks my wife for free, meaning it costs me nothing to keep working at my business.

Well, 150,000 of us are thick as shit.

I had a cat that trained me to sit down to pee.

The only time I could ever get her to purr was when when I was sat on the toilet. So, of course, I began sitting down to pee in order to maximise her purring and fusses. And it kinda stuck.

I once jokingly mentioned to my wife that leaving the seat up is just as convenient for me as leaving it down is for her. To which she pointed out that, of the four different permutations of toilet use between us, 3/4 require the seat to be down, so all in all, it makes sense to leave the seat down.

And dammit, I had to marry a logical autistic, didn’t I?

So now I always (try to remember to) leave the seat down.

Even then, it’ll be the fault of the people coming over with fuck all to try and rebuild their lives.