Accountant: “How the fuck do we have shrinkage on a door!?”

“We have peace prize at home”

“We got very inebriated, and we did what Marines on liberty do, and we decided to go get a tattoo. We went to a tattoo parlor in Split, Croatia. We chose a terrifying-looking skull and crossbones off the wall … a pretty standard military thing,”

and you did not, at any point in this “skull and crossbones” endeavor, have your “are we the baddies” moment?

Same. You know what’s a hassle? Seeing a doctor. You know what’s not? Sleeping.

I couldn’t find my Windows 7 key after reinstalling.

That is aggressively French

Yeah, so far it’s a good idea to look for anything that looks like 10 fonts at once