This could have been prevented if armed ‘protection’ drones had been installed at the school. The cops could have just stayed in the donut shop while the drones swarmed the student.

ITT: drifts being thrown around all willy-nilly!

The moth memes achieved their final transformation.

I used to keep my eyes in my pocket too!

This doesn’t seem right!

“… a staggering 224 years in Glasgow”

Unless we’re talking about trans Glaswegian vampires this seems desperately unlikely.

My daughter and wife both made the appropriate horrified, shocked face when I showed them this.

Personally, as long as I can have my deep pan, spicy beef x2, spicy pork x2, spicy sausage x2, doner meat x2, peperonni, fresh chilli, and jalapeno pizza I don’t care what other people have on theirs. My wife likes sweetcorn and pineapple, and knowing this I still married her.

A strong position to take on a post about a full English.

Veggie versions abound, though, replacing pork sausages with Glamorgan sausages and bacon with halloumi or some such. And you can get vegan black pudding too, though I’ve never tried it. A good veggie version is fine eating.

Once you go full vegan though, it gets a bit harder since you also need to fake the eggs (and I’ve only heard of people doing tofu-based scrambled ‘eggs’) and faking or swapping out the bacon and the sausages and the black pudding so by that stage I’d be wondering why I was trying to recreate such a meat forward meal.

Well, you’re very welcome to continue enjoying your fry-ups.

What you describe is a mere fry-up. The required ingredients of a full English are eggs, bacon, sausage, black pudding, beans, and tomato. Six perfect ingredients.

There’s nothing wrong with a fry-up, mind you. But it’s not a full English without the six.

I’m guessing you’ve never tried it. It’s a glorious food stuff and the full English is its perfect context.

It might not sound appetising but it tastes great. Try it sometime. And in a full English is where it’s best with a little egg, beans and tomato. Lush.

Not really it’s delicious. And eaten in one form or another in all parts of the world.

Are you sure?

Wikipedia tells me blood sausages are available in Puerto Rico, Wisconsin, Maine, Michigan, the San Francisco Bay Area, Fresno, Santa Rosa, and of course, Cajun Louisiana.

You rarely have a full English followed by a heavy lunch. More likely a heavy nap.

Some things matter!

This is not a full English due to the following issues or errors:

• Fried eggs are ideal, poached acceptable, and some oddballs like scrambled. Boiled egg is not acceptable. There should be two eggs as standard, more if the breakfast is a ‘large’.
• It’s missing baked beans, which should have been simmered until the sauce thickens into a syrup.
• While cafes love to serve this kind of tomato that’s only because it’s easy to keep a pot of chopped, tinned tomatoes warm. If you’re going tinned, they should be good quality whole plum tomatoes. But well-grilled fresh tomatoes are preferable. No cherries. No vine attached. Definitely no raw tomato.
• It’s missing the black pudding which elevates the humble fry-up into the glory that is a proper full English.
• Experienced afficionados of the full English almost all prefer cooked sausages over raw ones.
• The mushrooms look like they came in a tin. Ideally whole field or chestnut mushrooms shoud be used.
• There seems to be a lack of hot buttered toast (with optional marmelade).

There is hearty debate amongst the governing body of the full English about whether or not hash browns are acceptable on a breakfast. Many declare them to be unwanted compared to, for example, bubble and squeak or a tattie scone, or even fried potatoes, or a fried slice for that matter. They go further and label them ‘trash browns’, ‘American nonsense’, or just ‘shite’. Personally I don’t mind them, and consider them to be an optional addition, but not a core requirement of the full English. There are many other optional additions, not to mention regional specialities which render an Ulster fry very different to a full Welsh or a full Scottish. Hogs pudding, white pudding, fruit pudding, haggis, Lorne sausage, potato farl, soda bread, laverbread, kidneys, etc.

There is also a hugely spirited disagreement over the serving of baked beans. There are, by-and-large, three schools of thought with regards the beans (not counting those poor,deluded fools who don’t like them). Firstly there’s the ‘put the beans in a pot’ faction who are scared of bean juice contaminating other ingredients. Secondly there are those who eschew the ramekin, considering them to be one of the ultimate signs of pretention. They insist that the beans should be on the plate, but segregated from the other ingredients by a barrier of sausages. Lastly, there is the sane and balanced group who believe that the beans should be put on the plate with no barrier, ideally in the middle. This group of illuminated Full Monty enjoyers recognise that the mixing of bean juice, tomato juice, and egg yolk forms the most perfect gravy of the gods. I, myself, am in the latter camp.

I am available for for keynote speeches on the subject should anyone be organising a full English conference.

Hold that thought, my smart underpants are telling me I have a notification.

What sort of engineering standards are these cars built to?

Great way to get more cars on the road, good job big brains!