Title text:
We would like to once again apologize to Dr. Jones for last year’s mistaken announcement. We should really have double-checked the envelope for this award in particular.
Transcript:
Transcript will show once it’s been added to explainxkcd.com
Source: https://xkcd.com/3275/


Oh right, it’s not that tachyons don’t exist it’s that those dudes at CERN were all like “bro we just picked up FTL travel, check it out lol”
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tachyon#History